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Every time I tell you I'm trying. It's true. I'm trying to convince the scared side of me to go away. And if it was only that simple. He's a very stubborn one. I tell him that if I'm in love with you, I should be able to handle these simple little things. He thinks about it, then he backs off, and I have my way. Until the time for action arrives, then he jumps back in control like it'll be the end if I do whatever I was planning. I ask him why, and he just says, "what if you're wrong, what if it makes her hate you, do you really wanna risk that?" And I know he's wrong, I know if I screw up, you won't totally hate me (I think). Yet somehow, he's very convincing. I regret it every time I let him win. And it sucks. I can't stand being this useless, and I can't stand being me. Somedays I just wish I could switch personalities with someone. I think you'd like me better that way. I know I would.